Let me tell you about my morning:
Took a sip of Oros and promptly spilled the entire pint glass all over my bed.
Continued sleeping on a towel, like a 8 year-old boy with mummy issues.
Tried the waking thing again at 8 to find Vodacom had decided I’m unworthy of service and thus will give me no signal. Not even one bloody bar.
Decide I need coffee a little earlier today, despite the fact I’m already sweating like an over-weight mule.
Make myself a nice cup of coffee, with extra milk to ensure my ulcer doesn’t go all volcano-like on me, and sit down in front of my laptop.
If you hadn’t guessed, it wasn’t working. The screen flickers on and off, Outlook ‘recovers from some blasted error’ and takes ages to load, random beeping suggests it’s about to die. The bugger’s around 4 years’ old now, well on it’s way out, but I’m self-employed. Money is some imaginary thing celebrities have.
So I take a nice long chug off my coffee, to ease the stress of the blasted laptop.
I narrowly miss the screen/keyboard with my projectile coffee, as I realise the milk that was perfectly fine, is now no longer.
Long-life, my ass.
Go to chuck coffee away, so I can make a fresh cup, with fresh milk and re-start the bloody day….only to smash last night’s wine glass in the process.